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The Golf of Mexico - Mission Script

SCENE 3

WICK:
So…it seems my plan works the best, eh Platypus? Whose plan…I said my plan…Whose plan?

PLATYPUS:
("Your plan.")

WICK:
My plan! I knew it - it's my kind of "outside the box" thinking that will get this course built!

PLATYPUS:
("Huh!?")

WICK:
Give myself a raise…

PLATYPUS:
("What?")

WICK:
So…Platypus…we will now proceed to the next phase of my brilliant plan. This course-o-mine is going to have next generation golf holes. We're moving beyond windmills and clown mouths to something really useful. Lower the screen!

PLATYPUS:
("Blah blah blah")

WICK:
Now your average hole looks a little something like this: fairway…trees…sand… slow old golfers…water… the elephant… you know, the usual stuff. The problem: you can only finish in one place.

Pointer!

As I was saying, the old hole design doesn't take into account the normal golfer's (meaning me!) shot pattern. But now, that's all going to change…

Behold, the next-generation golf hole! I know what you're thinking…I am the smartest man, or platypus, alive.

PLATYPUS:
("Ha.")

WICK:
Three pins means I can hook like a heavyweight or slice like a French chef and still make par. And that's not all…

I've got some ideas to spice up golf in general, too. So I drew up some designs, like this one…the Zoo Hole…

PLATYPUS:
(Trumpets a cheer and elephant sound)

WICK:
…or this one, the Rapper Hole…

WICK: & PLATYPUS:
East Coast…West Coast…Australian coast…

PLATYPUS:
("In the house")

WICK:
…in the house! Wick is kickin' it old school!

…or how about the Romantic Evening hole? Those box-of-chocolate sand traps are going to be a killer! Bring a date!

PLATYPUS:
("Uh huh.")

WICK:
I've got lots more…
I've got lots more…
Hey! Kenny G! We're holding a meeting over here…

As I was saying, I've got lots more hole designs - the Middle School Locker hole, the Public Television hole…

PLATYPUS:
(Trumpets)

WICK:
Oh, lots more. I need to know how many of my great ideas can fit on my course. So, get to work! The Platypus and I have to work on our short game…

PLATYPUS:
("Ha!")

WICK:
er...hole designs.

PLATYPUS:
("Ah…")

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